One Hard Truth About Emigrating I Have to Tell You
And Four Tips On How To Get Through It
Elizabeth Silleck La Rue
4/17/20251 min read
It’s been two and a half years since we emigrated from Florida to Mexico, and I’ve realized recently, thanks to my clients, that I’ve overcome one of the hardest aspects of emigrating that I’m not sure I ever acknowledged.
It’s the grief.
At this point, the US feels like a foreign land. I can’t honestly identify anything that I “miss,” besides a few food items that aren’t readily available where we live.
But I did grieve.
We all grieve, I think. Those who choose to leave behind not just their homes, their neighborhoods, their states, their regions, but to cross international borders and willingly become immigrants to a new sovereign land.
Especially if you are from the US, where out-migration has historically been far less typical and many, many people never even live outside of the towns in which they were born, you will grieve.
You will grieve, even if you’re not a sentimental person.
It will be hard to let go of some of your stuff, even if you’re not materialistic.
You will feel nostalgia for strange things — a particular bodega or gas station you used to frequent, a particular sandwich or salad or three-side special from your favorite deli or takeout spot, a random rug or painting or amenity. The thing doesn’t matter — it’s the memory, the feeling attached. You will miss it and likely be surprised by how deeply it affects you.
You’ll grieve relationships that will never be the same. Distance might render them more or less harmonious, but they are guaranteed to be different either way. Proximity has a way of creating bonds, for better or worse. You might need to invest more energy into maintaining these relationships, and it may or may not work. You may even learn that you don’t want to anymore, and even by choice, you will grieve.
Emigrating is a process of letting go as much as a process of starting new.